I lost 400 followers this past week.
I also gained 600.
I lost 81 email subscribers.
I also gained 479 new subscribers.
All of this means I am getting closer to my core audience – but I didn't always look at it like that. I used to be so upset about unsubscribes and unfollows!
I used to want to make everyone happy online so I stayed vanilla.
Vanilla – pleasing everyone.
Not special, not kinky.
I built a vanilla name for myself. It wasn't as strong, as powerful or as ‘me'.
I got to about 8000 Instagram followers at the time with my vanilla content.
My content wasn't really rocket science and a bit self-obsessed.
At a certain point – I got sick of things.
I knew I could do better and be bigger.
I started making content that was ugly AF. I remember my friends laughing about it – but I didn't care a whole lot… because I started growing like crazy.
I got attention from new possible clients and had over a 1000 people per post saving my posts.
I became known for my no-BS education style. No one cared I had an ugly feed anymore, I became an authority.
Later on I switched fully to business coaching because that felt better. My true love was coaching + business so I decided to combine it.
Lately, I've been doing another pivot because I've been working hard on myself again.
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I invested 25.000 dollars in business coaching already this year alone.
I am getting coached together with Jessica (my business partner in my second business) and got to know myself all over again.
During those coachings… I've had to identify the things that were going wrong.
I discovered I wasn't feeling amazing + whole because… I was holding back.
Now – I'm not made to hold back!
I mean, when I was 18 I moved to Italy without speaking Italian or knowing anyone.
I am made to do my own thing.
I am made to be big.
And so are you. But you're probably holding back right now because of some of the beliefs we've been taught.
I'm here today to help you be bigger.
And I want to teach you how to be abundantly authentic and confident online.
5 truthbombs about online confidence
The audience you want to attract is not your current friend group. Think bigger! Don't base your creations on what they think, unless they're your target audience.
No one cares if you look pretty. People care that you are authentic and abundant. No one cares about your perfect photos. It's more about what you have to say than what you look like!
Showing up is always better than not showing up. Doing the work is better than not doing it. Give value and explain useful things to people without looking perfect. Just show the f* up!
Posting is always better than not posting. Don't sweat the perfect planned feed… because you might end up not posting. No one cares you have an ugly feed. Just post the damn thing.
You owe it to the world to spread your vision and mission. You are denying the world your gift! The way you explain and teach is unique… so stop denying this to the world. Show the world your gifts.
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Where do we start in being abundantly authentic?
- We dare to show up, even if we're afraid it will be too much for some people.
Because if they're intimidated, it's their problem and their reaction to us, it's not about us.
2. We dare to share flaws… in the spirit of being #perfectlyimperfect
Show a side of you that's vulnerable. Tell people about a fear or worry.
3. We tell people our story.
Because we owe it to ourselves to share how we got here!
4. We dare to share opinions.
Because when we don't polarize, we stay vanilla.
5. We show up on video… because that's the easiest way to get real, raw and authentic!
What happens when we do all this?
We create abundant freedom. We take away the pressure from building an online brand and we start ‘being' instead.
We attract the right people, the type of people we LOVE working with and surrounding ourselves with.
Life and business will become easier and you will stand behind what you do 100%. You will have confidence in you.
It is exhausting to play a role.
It is fantastic to be yourself.
My brother Matthew told me (when I was 15 years old) to never pretend to be someone I'm not when I start dating someone.
He was right. And he's still right.
Don't pretend to be someone you're not. When you are YOU – that's when we can create abundance.
It is exhausting to play a role that isn't yours. So let's not do that and let's be abundantly ourselves.
Thank you for being abundant with me <3
If you want more on building your confidence, I created a guide! Download 5 strategies to build your confidence here below.
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